When you’re raising a big family, peace and quiet are mythical creatures. Like unicorns, or toddlers who don’t ask for snacks every 8 minutes. But honestly? I wouldn’t trade it for the world.
Perhaps you’re here out of curiosity. Or maybe you’ve just found out baby number four is on the way. Or you’re staring at your scan thinking, “Oh crikey, a second set of twins!” Either way, welcome. You’re in good company.
In my house there’s always too many shoes by the front door, never enough loo roll, and someone always touching your stuff. But there’s also a mountain of love, chaos that makes you laugh until you cry, and a deep-rooted sense of togetherness, no matter how many arguments are had over the last biscuit.
What Even Is a Big Family?
Here in the UK, people usually start raising eyebrows when you’ve got more than three kids. I’ve got six, so I’m basically a walking spectacle every time we hit Aldi. But what counts as “large” varies wildly. Some cultures would call my brood modest, while others would assume I run a youth hostel.
And then there’s that bloke in India, Ziona Chana, who had 39 wives and 94 kids. Makes our bedtime routine look like a spa retreat. 🤯
The Beautiful Mayhem of Big Family Life
Growing up in a large family teaches you a few vital life skills. How to hide snacks, negotiate peace treaties, and brush your teeth while someone’s yelling through the door. But also patience, compromise, and how to love fiercely even when someone’s eaten your leftovers again.
There’s constant noise, sure, but also constant connection. You’re rarely lonely, even when you wish you were, and there’s always someone to talk to, fight with, or con into helping with chores.
Pros, Cons, and Everything in Between
Big families are full of laughter, learning, and enough emotional drama to rival EastEnders. Small families? Lovely in their own right. Quieter, more one on one time, and probably fewer holes in the walls.
But here’s the truth. Happiness doesn’t depend on the headcount. It depends on the heartbeats, the hugs, and whether anyone remembers to put the kettle on during a meltdown.
The Judgy Side Eye Society Gives Us
Being really honest I get a lot of looks. People love to judge. “Overpopulation!” they cry. “Get yourself a TV mate” Or my personal favourite, “Are they all yours?”
Yes, Sandra. All six. And I even know all their names. Fancy that.
We planned for this, budgeted (mostly), and no, we’re not feral just because we’re a crowd. We recycle, reuse, and yes, sometimes resort to fish fingers for dinner when the chaos reaches critical levels. We’re doing our best and that’s more than good enough.
The Real Talk: It’s Not All Sunshine and Matching Pyjamas
Yes, we argue. Sometimes about serious things, sometimes about who looked at who funny. Privacy? A luxury. Space? Limited. But love? Abundant.
And when it comes to food, don’t even think about leaving leftovers in the fridge unless you label it with your full name and a threat.
Organisation? Ha.
We run on a single centralised digital calendar. There’s a saying in our house: it its not in the calendar, it doesn’t exist. Everyone has jobs, yes, even the littlest ones. We promote the fact we all live in a shared space and we’re all responsible for it staying nice.
And no we don’t have regular family meetings. We fly by the seat of our pants, grabbing opinions of each child as they fly by.
Why I Wouldn’t Change a Thing
Raising a big family is like trying to herd caffeinated cats. But it’s also filled with belly laughs, snuggly bedtimes, and those bizarre inside jokes that only make sense if you’ve been part of the madness.
It’s not about perfection. It’s about presence.
And for anyone wondering if big families are worth it?
Yes. Unequivocally yes.
Even if it means never peeing alone again.