Our Christmas tree usually looks like a unicorn has vomited rainbow glitter all over it.

There’s no colour scheme. No carefully spaced baubles. No tasteful collection of decorations that complement the living room. Just an enormous amount of colour, tinsel and whatever the kids have decided absolutely has to go on the tree this year.

And I love it.

Although there are a few practical considerations.

For starters, the tree has to be attached to the wall with fishing line. Not because we’re particularly worried about it falling over of its own accord, but because there are children in this house who might decide to investigate what happens when you pull on a branch.

We also have to be a bit strategic with the decorations. The precious ones, the ornaments we’ve collected over the years or that have some sentimental value, go at the top. Safely out of reach of small hands.

Everything else is fair game.

Which is why, for years, the bottom three branches have carried approximately ninety per cent of the decorations.

When you’re little, that’s where you can reach. So that’s where everything goes.

One branch might have six baubles hanging from it. Another has three bits of tinsel, a homemade decoration and something that probably belongs in the toy box. Meanwhile, the top half of the tree looks as though somebody gave up decorating halfway through.

You could rearrange it all afterwards. Spread everything out, fill the gaps, make it look a bit more like the trees you see in shop windows.

But before you do, take a photo.

The Wonky Tree Photo

It’s one of the simplest Christmas traditions I can think of.

Every year, once the kids have finished decorating the tree, take a picture of it exactly as they’ve left it.

Don’t move the baubles. Don’t straighten the tinsel. Leave the slightly questionable ornament choices where they are.

Then do it again next year.

And the year after that.

At first, you’ll probably just have a collection of increasingly ridiculous Christmas trees. Which is a perfectly good reason to do it, to be fair.

But eventually, you’ll start noticing things.

The decorations that used to be clustered around the bottom of the tree have started creeping upwards.

There are fewer things hanging from the same branch. Or perhaps there are more, because somebody has developed a very particular artistic vision and refuses to take criticism.

The homemade decorations change too. Those little scribbly things that you once had to identify by asking what they were supposed to be become something a bit more recognisable.

And then one year, somebody puts the star on top of the tree without asking you to lift them up.

You might not even notice it at the time.

You’re probably busy untangling the lights, looking for the extension lead or wondering where you’ve put the bloody fishing line.

But there it is.

The child you used to lift onto your shoulders can reach the top of the tree all by themselves.

The things we don’t plan

There’s a lot of pressure around Christmas to make memories.

We’re supposed to organise activities, visit places, make things, bake things and create magical experiences that our children will treasure forever.

Which is lovely, in theory.

But sometimes the things that become family traditions aren’t the things we’ve planned at all.

They’re the things that happen because that’s just how your family does Christmas.

The fishing line holding the tree upright. The ancient decoration that goes right at the top because nobody trusts the little ones with it. The annual argument about where the star should go.

Even the ridiculous tree itself.

I think there’s something rather lovely about keeping a record of all that.

Not because every Christmas needs documenting, but because it’s easy to forget how much changes while you’re busy getting on with life.

One year you’re trying to stop a toddler eating a bauble. A few Christmases later, they’re helping you untangle the lights.

And before you know it, they’re putting the star on the tree without you.

Give it a go this Christmas

You don’t need anything special. Just your phone and whatever passes for a Christmas tree in your house.

Let the kids decorate it however they fancy, within whatever safety arrangements your family needs.

Then take a photo before you start tidying it up.

If you remember, take another one next year.

It doesn’t have to be a beautiful photograph. Nobody needs matching pyjamas or a carefully arranged background.

In fact, the wonkier the tree, the better.

Because years from now, when you’re looking back through those photos, I doubt you’ll care whether the decorations matched.

You might, however, find yourself missing the days when they were all on the bottom three branches.

More Christmas fun without the faff

The Wonky Tree Photo is one of the little traditions in The No-Faff Christmas Kit for Dads, which I put together to make Christmas with kids a bit more fun without adding another enormous job to your list.

There are quick games, printable decorations, daft challenges, family traditions and practical bits to help with the December chaos.

I’ve also included ideas for making Christmas work for kids who find all the noise, excitement and changes to routine a bit much.

Some activities need absolutely no preparation. Others take five minutes or a quick trip to the printer.

Use what works for your family and leave the rest.

Have a nose inside The No-Faff Christmas Kit for Dads, £19.99

Logan

A transgender Dad in the UK. Bringing up 6 kids with my lovely wife. When I’ m not blogging or TikToking, you’ll usually find me in the garden.