The Business of Being Dad
Real stories from a trans dad of six navigating fatherhood, SEN parenting, tube feeding, and the beautiful chaos of large family life in the UK. No filters. No fluff.
I have four autistic kids, and I still learn something new about parenting autistic kids most weeks. That is the first thing I would say to anyone just starting out on this, usually because a diagnosis has landed or the penny has quietly dropped. There is no manual, and if there were, mine would need … Read more
Every parents’ evening I have ever been to for one of my kids has gone roughly the same way. “Oh, they’re no trouble at all, an absolute pleasure, so well behaved.” And I nod and smile, and I think about the child who fell apart in the car park twenty minutes after pickup because the … Read more
Here is a thing that took me an embarrassingly long time to understand. You can have a child who genuinely loves drawing, and the very second you say “ooh, draw me a picture”, the drawing becomes impossible. Not sulky impossible. Actually impossible. The request itself is the problem, not the task. That is the strange, … Read more
There is a particular sound in our house that means the day has taken a turn. It is the sound of a sock being pulled off with real fury, because the seam is in the wrong place, and the wrong place is anywhere. If you have a child who covers their ears at the hand … Read more
Nobody hands you a rota when you become a parent. There is no clipboard, no “right, my shift is done, you take it from here” at five o’clock. In our house, with six kids and four of them autistic and two of them tube fed, the job does not clock off at all. It rolls … Read more
Our Christmas tree looks like a unicorn vomited rainbow glitter over it, and it’s held up with fishing line. Here’s why I think the wonky bits are worth remembering.
Most dads don’t get taught how to care for a baby until their own is placed in their arms. No wonder mums become the “default parent” the system is stacked that way. Thrown in at the Deep End Our first baby came three weeks early. She was tiny, just 4lb 11oz, and my wife had … Read more
Breaking Stereotypes, One Nappy at a Time Let’s Get One Thing Straight (except me) You’d think in 2026 we’d all be clear on what a transgender dad is. But no, apparently it still puzzles people more than assembling a flat-pack wardrobe without a manual. So, here we are. If you’re a fellow trans dad, a … Read more
SEN Support, EHCPs and the bits in between. What I wish someone had told me at the start, including the time a simple seat move made all the difference.
‘They seem fine here.’ If you’ve heard that one, me too. This is about why your gut still matters when school says everything’s fine.